Nothing fully prepares you for the journey of pregnancy, postpartum, and parenthood. Every individual has a nuanced experience, with limitless possibilities of variation. Through my perinatal experience, I came to understand the extent of how different each pregnancy can be, and how this can set the stage for lack of education and personalization in the healthcare setting.
I began focusing on prenatal and postpartum wellness when my first close friend became pregnant. I had always had a passion for helping people become more confident in the gym and find self empowerment. I realized that pregnant and postpartum mamas served as a perfect avatar for my desired clientele. Why? As my friends began to get pregnant, I became aware of the fear of exercise and the lack of understanding surrounding safe movement during pregnancy. I was surprised by this fear and hesitation because becoming a mother and growing a human is already badass and requires mental, emotional, and physical strength that can be complemented and enhanced with prenatal exercise.
In 2022, I became a certified pre/postnatal performance training specialist. Since then, I have helped moms prioritize self-care, feel stronger throughout pregnancy, recover quicker postpartum, and discover their inner strength. I was excited for the prospect of being that badass pregnant momma myself who exercises throughout her entire pregnancy. However, my journey brought me down a different path than what I had envisioned for myself.
My husband and I found out we were pregnant in early March 2024. Our baby boy surprised us about six months prior to the “plan” we had.
Lesson #1: Plans don’t always go as planned.
Besides the occasional nausea and pronounced exhaustion, I felt good and I felt strong! I was about to embark upon the journey that I envisioned for myself for years. I wanted to be an example for moms, showing them that they are badass and have the capacity to gain strength and improve mental and emotional health throughout pregnancy. Unfortunately, I had two seemingly benign bleeds in my first trimester that forced me to take my training down a notch. I worked out within my limitations, but felt inhibited and disappointed that I was going to be unable to workout the way I wanted to throughout my pregnancy.
Lesson #2: Pregnant women may be told that bleeding is normal during the first trimester. It is until it's not. This was my first experience with the multitude of unknowns and uncertainty throughout pregnancy.
Although I couldn't lift as heavy as I liked, I still moved my body, lifted weights, and went to my weekly pilates class. The benefits of exercising throughout pregnancy are extremely powerful. They include:
- Enhanced energy levels and improved sleep
- Decreased pregnancy aches and pains
- Diminished or decreased risk for lower back pain
- Improved posture as the body shifts and changes
- Improved public floor strength and mobility
- Improved mood and reduced anxiety
- Decreased risk of gestational diabetes and preeclampsia
- Prepares you for labor and delivery and parenthood
- Improved postpartum recovery and healing
I always tell my mamas that any movement is better than no movement. Maybe you have the energy for a weightlifting class or a jog, or maybe the day's movement is 20 minutes of stretching or a gentle walk. As you can see from the extensive list above, exercise and movement are so important for perinatal health and wellness.
Lesson #3: The word cerclage sounds nicer than it is.
At 19 weeks pregnant, I had another bleed. This felt different. I was well into the second trimester, and the risk of miscarriage turns into the risk of preterm labor around this point. To make a long story short, I was diagnosed with cervical insufficiency (or incompetency, pick your negative word to use surrounding women's pregnancy complications). My cervix had rapidly shortened over a few weeks, and was weak and having trouble withstanding pelvic and intra-abdominal pressure. I was code yellowed at my OB appointment and wheeled over to Cedar’s Sinai for emergency surgery. My doctor put two stitches around my cervix to keep it closed and prevent a second trimester miscarriage. This procedure is called a cerclage. About 50% of cervical insufficiency cases end up in second trimester miscarriage, and this emergency surgery saved our baby.
Lesson #4: Appreciate movement.
I'm a CrossFit, let-me-throw-heavy-stuff-around kind of girly. After my surgery, I was limited to 20 minutes of walking per day and 5 pound dumbbells for seated upper body exercises. Poof. There went the pregnancy I had envisioned. Anxiety and sadness crept in. How was my labor going to be after months of bed rest? I was not going to be able to practice my labor positions with my partner! What about my mental health? What about my clients? Everything that required standing or lifting things was now on my husband! How was I going to be prepared for labor and motherhood?
Lesson #5: Do not hold on too tightly to the prenatal, delivery, and postpartum experiences you expect to have. It is wonderful to have these ideal situations in mind, and take actions that align with your vision. However it is more important to allow yourself some grace when things do not go as planned. This is NOT A reflection of you. Pregnancy involves a large amount of trust in the process, and parents aren't always in the driver seat.
I came to be grateful for those short walks and light dumbbells. It is amazing how your perspective can shift based on your circumstances. However, this was not the end of my prenatal challenges. At 24 weeks, my cervix had completely funneled, and the only things separating the amniotic sac and my baby from the outside world were two stitches. Full bedrest commenced. At 25 weeks, I woke up at 12:30 in the morning in a pool of water. My water had broken early and I was experiencing preterm labor. In the midst of having a panic attack, my husband and I packed a crude hospital bag and headed to the hospital. This was July 28th. My due date was November 8th.
Lesson #6: You will be OK if you are not totally prepared! We had no hospital bag, no narrowed-down baby name list, and I had not taken any pregnancy or baby class. We ended up okay!
Lesson #7: Just because your water breaks doesn't mean that you are having a baby in the next 24 hours.
The medical team at Cedar’s Sinai was able to stop my labor. Did you know that amniotic fluid is primarily baby’s urine after 20 weeks? Baby boy kept replenishing the fluid that I would lose, and I was able to last two more weeks before I went into labor at 27 weeks pregnant. At 7:25 PM, baby boy was born at 2 pounds 1.7 ounces. The NICU team whisked him away to the back of the room, and my husband followed the team upstairs as I went into the OR for a stubborn placenta. We then embarked upon an 11-week NICU journey. The medical team and staff were extremely supportive. We had a social worker, parent mentor, and we were delivered weekly Shabbat boxes with challah and grape juice. It was clear that the team was invested in parent mental health and well-being.
Things that helped me get through our challenging NICU journey:
- The supportive medical team
- Allowing myself to feel ALL of my feelings: the good, bad, and the ugly
- My husband's love and support
- Rest
- Going on walks
- Parent visits
- Being able to move my body again
- Sound bath, yoga, and massage with my Doula
- Visits from friends
- Therapy
On October 25th, our baby boy was discharged at 38 weeks. He overcame several medical hurdles, learned how to feed on his own, and grew to a whopping 5 pounds 13.3 ounces before he was able to join our family at home. My husband and I felt joyful, yet odd. We thought 11 weeks at the NICU would mentally prepare us for parenthood, but it was suddenly thrust upon us and we were surprised how abrupt it felt. I felt totally disconnected from my pregnancy and birth experience, yet here we were bringing home our beautiful baby boy. I am still in awe at how we got here.
Lesson #8: There will be a variety of emotions in the postpartum period. Embrace them all, and give yourself grace.
Unless you have been through the NICU, it is hard to understand how draining and traumatic the experience is. The unending monitor alerts and alarms, the fear of unknowns and uncertainty, the daily fluctuations in progress, and the grief of losing the postpartum experience that you might have envisioned. We had good days when our son had good days, we had terrible days when he had bad ones. Now that he is home and healthy, we are tired but grateful. Our days are full of cuddles, coffee, and diaper changes, and we couldn’t be happier. We have several follow-up appointments and physical therapy and occupational therapy to help our premie “catch up.” Some days I mourn my freedom and sleep, some days I want to be kept up all night just to cuddle our baby boy. There is no correct way to feel postpartum, and the emotional journey is forever dynamic.
Whether your pregnancy has been smooth sailing, full of nausea and exhaustion, or exceptionally challenging, it is important to stay active and find moments for self-care. Here are some tips for staying active throughout your pregnancy journey:
- Moving for 10 minutes is better than no minutes
- Find the balance between a little push and listening to your body
- Rest and recovery will set you up for success
- Use YouTube for pregnancy specific movement classes
- Modify your workouts as needed
- Get a personal trainer or join in-person pregnancy-specific workout classes
- Stay hydrated and fuel your body with nutritious food
- Take extra rest in your workouts
- Be proud of what you accomplish!
If you are a pregnant or postpartum mom, know that the journey can be both beautiful and arduous. Find your support system, a doctor/midwife who listens to you, and things that you can do to fill your cup. Exercise is one of many ways to show self-care during the perinatal period. Every day will feel different, and no pregnancy journey is the same.
If you are interested in joining my virtual and in-person prenatal and postpartum momma community, email “BLOOM” to arielle@empwrwellness.net
Authored by: Arielle Creager